


it will be more like a song and less like it's math

by youhaventyet



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Radio Host Himuro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-02
Updated: 2014-10-02
Packaged: 2018-02-19 15:59:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2394386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youhaventyet/pseuds/youhaventyet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Atsushi drops by while Himuro is smoking his last cigarette before going on air. He's got a scarf tucked around his face and a cardboard coffee cup in his hands; when he sees him, Himuro flicks his cigarette away and smiles his welcome.</p>
            </blockquote>





	it will be more like a song and less like it's math

Atsushi drops by while Himuro is smoking his last cigarette before going on air. He's got a scarf tucked around his face and a cardboard coffee cup in his hands; when he sees him, Himuro flicks his cigarette away and smiles his welcome.

"Murochin, this is the last time I do something nice for you until it starts to be warm again," Atsushi says, once he's handed him his cup (Irish coffee, for the evening broadcast). 

"Ah, you didn't need to," Himuro says, because he knows how much Atsushi hates the cold. White earmuffs poke out from under locks of his purple hair, making his disgruntled face even cuter. "Thank you so much."

"Don't be so formal. It makes me sick," Atsushi replies, but he looks vaguely pleased under his scowl.

Himuro smiles at him, takes a sip. The cream on top tastes fresh and sweet, sprinkled with cinnamon, and then bitter spiked coffee is flooding his mouth. He feels warm all over, forgets about the too-cold autumn air biting at his bones. He makes a come-hither motion with his hand, and Atsushi (after sighing like he's tired of indulging a kid) bends down. His warm breath kisses Himuro before his lips do.

 

"Of course you got a spot as a radio host," Taiga had said when he first told him the news. Then he'd blushed and refused to elaborate on why.

"Murochin should stop teasing Kagami," Atsushi had said,more jealousy than kindness, which had made Himuro chuckle.

 

It's just a one-hour broadcast on the campus radio, but he likes it a lot. He gets to play foreign music, help out people who want to make their bands known. In May, he airs Fukui's band first single and just like that, it goes viral.

"I knew your all-around prettiness would come in handy one day," Fukui tells him, with tears in his eyes, when they get together to celebrate. He'd like to say senpai is drunk, but his tears are merely grateful and he has to pretend not to be embarrassed.

"I don't know what you're talking about, senpai."

"Yeah, as if."

 

Atsushi starts bringing him coffee after he gets wind of some girls that have been waiting for Himuro in front of the radio station building before and after his broadcast.

He has a glare in his eyes which he directs to anyone who might seem to have an interest in Himuro (due to his 'all-around prettiness', they're quite a few), and a coffee cup from the place he works at clutched in his hands.

Himuro tries to tell him that the girls are just being nice (some of them really just wanted to thank him for introducing them to good music) but Atsushi is deaf to his words, as he often is.

The third time he comes and his strategy still hasn't started working, he kisses Himuro right on the mouth, right in front of the radio station, where everyone can see.

"Ah," Himuro sighs, sliding his hands into the front pockets of Atsushi's jeans, his face still tilted up, waiting for more kisses. "So I have to get you jealous to get you to kiss me in public?"

"Kissing in public is weird, Murochin," Atsushi replies, as if he's not staring at his lips with hungry eyes, as if he didn't just have his tongue in his mouth. "You're such a returnee."

And being a returnee is his excuse for getting caught kissing another guy in broad daylight. Nobody even tries to talk to Atsushi, who's not even attending the same school as Himuro and apparently looks too scary to approach. 

Very few girls with ill intentions keep showing up at the radio station.

Himuro would never admit it, as it would jinx everything (he's not superstitious, just talking from experience), but he's just… happy.

 

The decision to stay in Japan even after high school doesn't come easy: he fights with his parents, Taiga, Atsushi, and mostly with himself.

"You'll get a better education in America," his parents say, and Taiga adds "But don't you want to keep playing?" and Atsushi, strangely selfless, tells him: "You'd be wasted here, Murochin."

He knows all of this and more, really, he does. He misses America, and he feels so much like a stranger in Japan. And yet.

The only one he doesn't fight with is Alex. They sit on Taiga's balcony once he's conked out on the couch, sharing a cigarette, and she says: "So what if you fell in love and want to stay?"

"Isn't that a shit reason?"

"I don't know, Tatsuya; isn't he the most important person in your life right now?" He doesn't answer. "I'm not telling you to waste the next whatever years of your life on him. You live your life and enjoy having him in it."

"I could do that long-distance, too."

"Yeah, but would you be satisfied with that?"

 

_He wouldn't. He really wouldn't._

 

He moves to Tokyo and spends his first year of university in a dorm; working, studying, sleeping.

He meets up with Taiga, mostly on weekends, and sometimes they have street games. Taiga nags at him about his smoking habit almost constantly (he'll quit it in a year, when Kuroko picks it up too and threatens to sucker punch him if he keeps complaining). 

He skypes with Atsushi a lot, and feels his chest burn when he looks at the down-turned corners of his mouth and sweet eyes. _I'm waiting for you, hurry up_ , he doesn't say, and he knows in moments like this that he made the right choice.

 

Once Atsushi graduates, he comes back to Tokyo to attend Le Cordon Blue Tokyo University, and they move in together, in a three-room apartment Atsushi sister finds for them.

They have a tiny kitchen, and they turn the bigger bedroom into a living room. Their most pricey investment is a huge bed for the both of them to comfortably fit in.

Once they're done unpacking, while Himuro is staring at their work in satisfaction, Atsushi drops a heavy hand on the small of his back.

"What is it, Atsu-" he can't finish his sentence, though, because he's being kissed.

"House warming gift," Atsushi says, once he's done. He still has his fingers curled in the collar of Himuro's shirt.

"You're so weird," he says, all affection, which means  _you're so cute_ , which means  _I'm so glad you're finally here_ .

 

"I'm staying," he tells Atsushi two months before graduation, after he's made up his mind. Atsushi stops eating his chips to glare at him, suspicious. "I found a really cool university and something I want to do here, isn't it enough?"

"If I am the ' _thing_ ' you want to do, Murochin..."

"That's not what I meant at all." He waits for Atsushi to start eating again before he goes on. "I'm serious. You don't need to worry about me. I won't be wasted here, Atsushi."

"They say it's common courtesy to worry for the guy you're fucking, but if you say so..."

Himuro laughs. "Don't worry about  _this_ , then. I have my reasons and they're good." He leans in to wipe away the crumbs around Atsushi's mouth, licks at his thumb to taste what Atsushi's lips would taste like right now. Salt and sesame. "Besides, if you're coming to Tokyo for university, we can live together."

"You already know I'm coming," Atsushi huffs, and throws away his chip bag to lean in, place a kiss right under Himuro's eye, where is mole is.

 

He never tells Atsushi  _the reason_ he decided to stay. He figures Atsushi is smart enough to guess it on his own.

 

They say you're fucked in love if every song you hear makes you think of your special person. Himuro has had an ever-growing playlist of songs that remind him of Atsushi on his phone since his second year of high school.

 

They've been living together for little more than six months, and Himuro has become comfortably used to coming back home late to Atsushi, sprawled on the futon they use as a couch.

They've already taken out the kotatsu, and Atsushi has his chin propped on it, watching four girls singing in Korean and dancing on his laptop's screen. He likes girls groups and idols, so much that Himuro has become an expert by proxy. He knows Atsushi listens to his broadcast, so he makes a point of playing kpop, sometimes; Atsushi's favourites, like F(x), 2NE1, ChoColat.

"I'm back," he calls, and Atsushi pauses the video, stretches like a lazy cat.

"Welcome home." It still makes Himuro smile when he says it.

He takes off his shoes, hangs up his jacket, leaves his bag on the floor and pads to the kitchen on socked foot. He's tired.

While he's filling up the kettle, Atsushi comes in and drapes himself on his back, the tips of his hair tickling at Himuro's ears.

"I brought  cake from work, Murochin," he says, rubbing his cheek on the top of his head. 

"Thank you," Himuro sighs, slumping back into Atsushi. _I'm so glad to be here._

Once he's done brewing his tea, sitting together at the kotatsu, Himuro does some of his class readings while Atsushi ends up eating almost all of the cake by himself. He lies down with his head on Himuro's knee, waiting for him to be done.

"Murochiiin," he starts whining after an hour.

"Ah, yeah, sorry. Do you wanna go to bed without me?"

Atsugi glares at him. "I'm not going to bed without Murochin. And besides, you'll get bags under your eyes if you don't sleep. Can't have that."

"Very funny, Atsushi." He tries poking his nose as payback, but Atsushi catches his finger and nibbles on it, soft.

"I'm gonna get hungry again if you don't come to bed. Let's go."

 

"So you're basically married," Taiga says through the computer's speakers one week later.

"I don't want to hear that from you," Himuro says, and adds, at Taiga's disgruntled expression: "You shouldn't make this kind of jokes if you dislike having them addressed at you so much."

"Will you ever forget about that picture of Aomine and Kuroko I had as my phone lock screen? I already told you nothing's going on."

"Sure." He takes a bite of the onigiri Atsushi left him for lunch, demure. Even when he's working the noon shift at the bakery Atsushi still makes sure to leave him some food, because he doesn't trust Himuro to remember he has to eat.

(Atsushi is still lazy, still childish, but he's grown up so much since his high school days that Himuro can't help but feel proud.)

"What I wanted to say," Taiga grinds out, looking as if he's summoning his patience. It's a good look on him. "Is that you should tell Murasakibara how disgustingly in love you are with him, if only because you look the most happy I've ever seen you. I can _feel it_ all the way from America."

Himuro bites his lip. "Don't get cocky, Taiga. Maybe I've already told him and you're just poking your nose where you shouldn't."

Taiga just laughs at him.

 

Himuro doesn't want to need Atsushi, but sometimes he just  _aches_ for him; being surrounded by him, his presence and warmth, the smell of his cotton candy shampoo - sometimes it all makes him weak in the wrists.

He puts on Maroon 5's  _Sugar_ during his broadcast and tries not to feel like he’s fucked.

 

It's 3am and they're at the convenience store a block away from their apartment, trying out 'Halloween-flavoured' candies, hiding behind the shelves not to get caught opening the box – they'll pay for it later anyway.

The radio is playing  _Candy Candy_ by Kyary Pamyu Pamyu and Himuro keeps laughing at the absurdity of it all, at the fact that they're here because Atsushi had a craving, at the ridiculous song in the background and at how sticky these candies are, how sticky they make their kisses.

"They lack punch," Atsushi decides. "Only the best sweets should come out for Murochin's birthday."

That makes him giggle; he presses a palm to his mouth to regain some composure. Atsushi has none of it, pries his hand away to kiss him, as if he wants to make sure these candies are deluding even tasting them from Himuro's mouth.

 

He plays  _Accidentally In Love_ during his next broadcast and doesn't regret it one bit.

 

Atsushi comes pick him up one evening, bringing a cup of chai tea. He keeps sipping from his own drink, grumbling about how cold he is until Himuro slips his hand into his coat's pocket and tangles their fingers together. They walk like that to the station.

Once they're on the train, he puts his head on Atsuhi's shoulder and sighs, content.

"I'm not wasted here at all," Himuro whispers, and he knows Atsushi is listening even though he's not looking at him. "I'm just a student with a radio broadcast and a bad smoking habit."

"You could do better," Atsushi replies, blunt.

Himuro laughs a little. "Maybe so, but I don't want to do better than you." Finally, Atsushi turns to look at him. "I'm saying I stayed for you, and I'd do it again."

Atsushi's eyes go wide and cold. "That's so stupid, Murochin," he says after a moment, and his voice freezes Himuro's heart in his chest.

 

He spends the night smoking. Thinking that Atsushi is going to get it, sooner or later. It's too cold to smoke on the balcony, and soon the air in the living room feels unbreathable. They've been sleeping together in the same bed for six months and now the futon feels too big and empty.

He wants to wake Atsushi up, tell him  _I thought you knew, I thought you would be happy to hear it_ . Of course, he doesn't. If they were still teenagers (technically, Atsushi still is) he would've punched him in the face. But they're past that, aren't they?

He slips out of the apartment early for his morning class and doesn't come back for lunch.

 

There's this Fall Out Boy song,  _I've Got A Dark Alley And A Bad Idea That Says You Should Shut Your Mouth_ , which Himuro thinks pretty much sums up his life.

He resolutely tells himself he won't listen to it today, and ends up listening to it at least three hundred times.

 

He has two missed calls from Atsushi, but he goes to the library and skypes Alex instead of calling him back. 

They spend the better part of an hour playing Cards Against Humanity online. In the end, she just tells him: "You know how to fix this."

He gets out to have a smoke, even though he already reeks of it, and, yeah. He guesses he does.

 

"I've had a pretty rough day," he says into the mic that evening. He feels tired without Atsushi's Irish coffee burning through his body. "So I'm gonna play the song that matters the most to me first thing first. I hope the person I want to dedicate this to is actually listening. Atsushi, I know you understand English better than you let on."

He takes a deep breath. This is not smooth at all. He puts on  _Candy Store_ and crosses his fingers.

 

When he steps out of the radio building Atsushi is there, leaning against a tree with a cardboard cup in his hands.

Himuro feels himself melt. Atsushi moves towards him without hesitation, only fluid motions. “You're a sap, Murochin," is the first thing he tells him.

Himuro laughs. He does his best not to make it sound wet. "Well, I  _am_ in love with you. I'm allowed."

"You're so stupid. And you also smell like an ashtray." Atsushi scrunches up his face. Presses the cup in his hands. "I'm not kissing you until you drink this."

"How cruel," he says, taking a sip. Pumpkin spiced latte, just a little too sweet.

Atsushi just touches his cheek, rough fingers molding softly to the curve of his face. "I liked that song." And he waits only as long as it takes to Himuro to finish swallowing to kiss him.

They both sigh.

"Let's go home," Atsushi says.

 

Two days later, as he's about to step out of the house for his morning class, he notices a song he doesn't remember uploading on his Atsushi playlist. It's called  _I Want Candy_ . It takes him exactly one minute to pause it and go back to the bedroom, where Atsushi is a lump under the blankets.

He jumps on him, finds his grumbling, grumpy face under the covers, and starts planting kisses on every centimeter of skin.

"Ugh, Murochiiin," Atsushi whines, with a flush on his cheeks.

"Who's the sap now, eh?"

"You're the one who has a playlist about me."

"You're the one who calls me 'Candy' in his head."

"It's because Murochin is so sweet," Atsushi says, dripping with sarcasm. There's something soft in the curve of his mouth Himuro just has to kiss.

"I love Murochin, too," Atsushi says, quiet, in the little space between their mouths. Himuro feels his heart thump. And then it squeezes for a completely different reason when Atsushi adds: "And he's gonna be late for class."

He jumps up, says: "We're not done talking about this."

"Never," Atsushi replies, already back under the covers.

Himuro laughs his way out of the apartment, pressing shuffle on his Atsushi playlist.

 

**Author's Note:**

> playlist:  
> [Maroon 5 - _Sugar ___](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCo_31zmiK0)  
> [Kyary Pamyu Pamyu - _Candy Candy_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoK8DaJRDaM)  
> [Counting Crows - _Accidentally In Love_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22bK0C2obFc)  
> [Fall Out Boy - _I've Got A Dark Alley And A Bad Idea That Says You Should Shut Your Mouth ___](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbFTxHcGQqs)  
> [Faber Drive ft. Ish - _Candy Store_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mum11MUAnK8)  
> [Aaron Carter - _Candy_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e35FSyv2XxI)
> 
> thanks to [thimble](http://www.archiveofourown.org/users/thimble) and [babbitly](http://www.archiveofourown.org/users/babbitly) for sharing their murahimu songs with me, i hope i did your hcs justice çAç  
> (who is surprised i didn't write rule 63) (i am)


End file.
